WHO IS TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE?

WHO IS TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE?

This is gonna be the weirdest blog so far. I guess we can’t just ignore some instincts or motivation can we? I am writing this blog with a particular story on my mind. I am not sure if i will tell the story in this blog but i will relay what motivated me to write today. FYI this blog has a question as a title and its because i need answers from you.

Generally, there is this ideology that when two heart are in love, the male is the one to make the first move. Honestly, this ideology seems to have done more harm than good cause 95% of ladies that wait on the men to make the first move don’t end up dating the man. Why? well, that answer is for you to give to me.

I must say i commend ladies who are bold enough to open up to the men on their feeling for them. Please note, i’m actually talking about feelings of love towards someone nothing more or less lol. I have a personal experience i will like to share with you all:

Back in 2012, i was in high school, there was this cute guy(i won’t be able to write names) i had a crush on; it was more than a crush though…i would say i was in love with him. I had never felt that way before(young love)lol. I would literally do anything for him: i would steal for him, i would lie for him, i would forget about my own self-care just to be with him-an instance of when he fell sick with chicken pox.

My first love…

I was the only student in class that sat close to him cause everyone was afraid of contracting the diseases but i was not bothered. Stupid right? Well, call it what you want but, that was love for me. He was my first love and i wanted to make the most of it.

We spent three(3) years in senior high school together and OMG it had a sad end. My friends advised me not to approach him first. “…It will mean you’re cheap and lack self-control” they said to me. I didn’t want to appear as a cheap girl so i kept my cool and waited.(In my case, i longed). The story has quite a lot of twists to it but i will progress to 2014 when things started falling apart. Before i continue, i want you to understand that this guy loved me. Though he never told me, but he tells his friends about it and they would tell me. I guess he didn’t know what method to approach me from.

…things started to fall apart…

Gosh! i must say i feel so silly writing this; this is the silliest part of my existence and i’m currently having mixed feelings about putting it up here. Although, it’ll also come down to the topic of this blog.

Okay so it’s 2014 and this student gets admitted into our school. She was a social type but there was something i didn’t like; she was always around my crush! AH! I could only stare at them from a distance. When i asked, some friends said she is an old student(she was with them during junior high school. She went into another school and came back here again). The most intense part of her story was that she was his(my crush) first love! Shocking right? Don’t worry, I’ll explain…

They dated during junior high school days…now why did they split? The guy(my crush) caught her cheating on him with another guy who happened to be his(my crush) best friend!! Jeez! Ladies are so full of character lol… I wanna ask you something really important here: do you remember who your first love is? Is it true that no matter how long the breakup or separation(between you and your first love) might be, those feelings will definitely rush back in if you two were to meet again? This is really scary. But this is exactly what happened to my crush, my first love…(sniffs) I think I’m gonna cry… Despite the fact that she broke his heart, his feelings for her came rushing back and killed his feelings for me…(okay that’s a ridiculous statement) lol.. Please don’t mind my choice of words…xoxo.

I believe you might be asking what move I made to save my heart from being smashed. Honestly, I did nothing. I had this mindset that if he loved me, he’ll come for me and I just didn’t want to force myself on him. (Sighs)that is a silly and weak mindset. The me of today would have looked him straight in the eyes and told him. Anyways, I guess that’s what teenagers do when they’re in love. lol.

…my heart cracked…

So, let me rush it all up; one day I got to school only to hear news update that he(you know who already) asked her to be his girlfriend and she said she would think about it before giving him a response…I need to take a glass of water…

Okay I’m back… Lol. So, my heart literally cracked. Funny right? To spice up the whole matter, two days later, the girl accepted and they started dating…

[beep] [beep] [beep] [beep] [beep]

That is the sound of my heart beeping. Hahahhahaahha…honestly guys, he broke my heart, literally. I developed a heartburn that disturbed me for years(I wrote a blog on it. Click here to read it.xoxo). I went home after school and I wept. I cried till my stomach got filled up.

Do you remember the lyrics from one of Justin Bieber’s song?

…my first love broke my heart for the first time…

Justin Bieber (Baby)

This was my testimony. I regretted falling in love. I felt so useless and stupid…okay okay let me not bore you.

To conclude this blog, I wanna highlight a moment in 2017, I was older and yes I still had those feelings for that guy, I decided to talk to him about it and tell him how much he hurt me. This was where I got the real shock; when i asked him what he felt for me, he replied thus

…At first, it was just ordinary but as time went on, things started changing. I was just being childish…There was a little chemistry…Yes i loved you but not as you did…

Anonymous

…go for love…

(Sobs)… A word of advice to my fellow ladies: please go for love. Open up your heart and emotions to the ones you love. Everything won’t always go as you have planned or imagined it.

Honestly, i wanna thank you for being with me up till now. I really would love to know if you have an experience you would love to share. You could do so in the comment section. Also, if you feel your experience is something the world needs to learn from and you would want me to write a blog about it, just send a message request to my email address sandraazuike6@gmail.com and let’s discuss your blog together. xoxo.

In conclusion lovelies, it seems i ended up telling my story instead. Hope you enjoyed it. Please like this blog(the like button below) if you enjoyed this journey with me. I wanna drop a question for us all to respond to: Who is to make the first step and why? Please comment your answers. I will be looking forward to them. I will hopefully be awaiting your message requests too.

Remember, i love you.

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